Why we break New Years Resolutions within 2 weeks

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New year, New me we all say. We all know the feeling when it gets to the start of a new year and we ponder over all our regrets from the previous year then beat ourselves up about all the bad decisions we made and opportunities we didn’t take then think of heaps of things we are going to do differently this year to reach these new goals to better our lives. Then by February we have given up, familiar story right? 

Would you believe me if I told you that only 8% of people who make New Years Resolutions actually succeed in achieving them? That’s a 92% failure rate according to Jack Canfields research and as early as January 15th these people have already broken their resolutions. People try to do too much too soon, get overwhelmed with obstacles and burn out. 

So what is the key to creating new years resolutions and setting goals instead of just a wish list? Here are 3 things you will need to create commitment and lasting change:

1. A COMPELLING EXCITING VISION for what it is that you really badly want not just half heartedly want. The passion will pull you forward towards what it is you want if this vision excites you. 

2. STRONG ENOUGH REASONS which will make you follow through when the going gets tough. You will face considerations, fears and roadblocks when you set a goal so you will need a strong enough reason to keep you going so you don’t give up when the going gets tough. 

3. REGULAR DAILY REVIEWS OF YOUR GOALS. You will need to remind yourself of these goals every day. You will really need to feel these goals, feel as if you would if you had already achieved them. Write them down and believe they are achievable. Try writing your top goal in your purse and reading it every time you open it as if it was already achieved with what you want by when.

Get out a pen and paper and write down:

  • What it is that you badly want? Make sure you are passionate about it enough to want to get out of bed every morning excited about working on these goals
  • Your reason for wanting to reach these goals. How will you feel when you reach each one and why is it important to you?
  • Your goal/ goals and the date you want to have achieved them by as if they are already achieved. For example by March 10th I am sitting in a coffee shop drinking a soy caramel latte feeling proud that I have set up my new business website and have 5 new clients. Be as specific as you can.

All of your future goals and dreams are not only a reflection of your subconscious thinking, they are also mediated by your Reticular Activating System (RAS). I watched a video about the RAS last year and have become so fascinated by it and how it helps with goal setting. The RAS is the part of your brain that serves as a filter between your conscious mind and your subconscious mind. The RAS, which is located in the core of your brain stem, takes instructions from your conscious mind, and passes them on to your subconscious mind. The brain has to take in so much and the RAS acts as the filter to let us know what is important and what we should pay attention to. Because of this biological function, whatever you are thinking about or focusing upon will seep down into your subconscious mind only to reappear at a future time. Have you ever decided that you wanted a certain handbag, and then suddenly all you see is this handbag everywhere? That is how the RAS works so be super careful about what you focus on and ensure it is positive not negative. Make your vision as vivid as possible and the brain will act to get you to your goals by showing you what is important.

While I am such a strong believer in goal setting, I also want to stress that reaching a specific goal will not make you happy. Happiness will come from growth and progress so enjoy the journey and don’t get disheartened when you look at your goal and you aren’t there yet.

It is also important to note that you can’t just look at your goal and wish it into existence! A goal without a plan is just a wish. You will need a list of daily, weekly and monthly tasks to get you closer to your goal – a plan. I have goals but I focus on systems and processes to get to my goals. For example I am a Personal Stylist with a training academy so a goal of mine is to grow my academy and have a whole online training programme by the summer. I never feel unhappy that I am not there yet, I am excited by the clear vision and I focus on my commitment to daily practices which will get me there.

I invite you to try this out and share with your friends so you can remind and encourage each other! Enjoy your goal setting and enjoy the journey of your own personal growth.

– CASEY PAUL

For any queries feel free to reach out to me at casey@caseypaulstyling.co.uk

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