Blame is something we all do, and it can often feel like everything is someone or something else’s fault. Think about the amount of times you look for every reason outside of yourself as the reason things aren’t working out. It’s like searching for your mobile phone in the restaurant you just left when you know its in your back pocket.
I want to tell you that YOU are responsible for the results you are seeing in your life and you can choose to see the cup as half empty or half full.
I recently watched a TED talk with Isaak Lidsky ‘What reality are you creating for yourself’ and I highly recommend you watching it. He is a blind man who in his introspective, personal talk, challenges us to let go of excuses, assumptions and fears, and accept the awesome responsibility of being the creators of our own reality. He has a family, is a successful business man and public speaker – if he can do it we all can.
I have had to learn to take full responsibility for my life, and trust me at times it’s not easy. If I can blame something outside of myself then it takes the pressure off me and I always have an excuse for why things haven’t gone to plan. Excuses became my habit. I soon realised that if I wanted to start seeing some serious results then I would have to stop these excuses and start looking within myself. It was only by acknowledging that I had created everything up until now that I could take charge of creating the future I wanted.
You are in control of your own life! It seems quite daunting at first, but when you realise that you create your own reality, you realise that you can change things you don’t like and create the outcomes you want.
Here are some of my old excuses when I was starting out as a Personal Stylist:
- I am on a budget and won’t be able to buy the clothes I want to wear so won’t look like a stylist
- I studied law at uni not fashion so everyone will know more than me
- I am older than loads of other stylists out there who have had a head start
- I don’t know anyone in the industry so where do I start
- I don’t have a big budget so my website wont look as good as other stylists
GIVE UP THE EXCUSES CASEY!
I realised if I wanted something I didn’t have I would have to do things I had never done… now it’s your turn.
In Jack Canfields book ‘How to get from where you are to where you want to be’ he explains a formula for understanding this concept further:
E + O = R
EVENT + RESPONSE = OUTCOME
1.You can blame the E for your outcome.
2. You can instead simply change your R’s to the E’s until you get the O’s you want.
Give up the blame, give up complaining. Complaining about things just means you think there is something better and you know you would prefer it but you are unwilling to take the risks required to create it. Complaining is an ineffective response to an event that doesn’t produce a better outcome!
I want you to start paying attention to the results in your life and work and notice where things aren’t working and change them until they do work. Ask for help where you need it and remember you are not alone in this journey. It is your choice whether you choose to use the tools and ask the questions you need to ask. You want to be a Personal Stylist and you CAN and WILL get there if you want it. I will give you an example.
Student A+B want to get more clients and in turn money! Student A goes to a press event and posts up pictures, talks to the brand pr team and out of it gets recognised as a busy in the know Personal Stylist, not to mention the free gift Student A gets. Student A also posts out videos and information to her audience on Colour Analysis and other free info and free consultations to get people interested in her new business and out of 10 free consultations by phone 2 people book up a paid Wardrobe Detox Service from you. Student B procrastinates, makes excuses, self doubts and blames everything outside of themselves then wonders why they aren’t making a business. I have been both people and I get it but I’m telling you now that nothing ever came my way when I was B!
Lets take some action and get excited for 2017 and what opportunity it has in store for you all.
Right, are you ready to take full responsibility for where you are in your life and start getting to where you want to be? Bye bye blame, hello happiness.